Unfortunately we had to cancel the one in April. I thought that it was jinxed because i spoke about it to my colleagues at work. My colleagues are nice people but i have noticed that whenever I get too excited about any vacation or trip that I am taking in the future and talk about it to anyone, it gets jinxed. Out of nowhere circumstances develop which jeopardizes the trip. Like Hubby will have some urgent work that week or the weather will not be conducive. And a lot of times i have ended up canceling it.

So for the one in May i kept mum. I didn’t speak about it until after i was done camping. In fact, I wanted it to be a romantic experience for me and Hubby and so we didn’t invite any friends to join us. I called it the “Jungle Mein Mangal” experience… he he

We had all our camping equipment from last year packed in the store room as is. That included the tent and its accessories, the propane stove and extra cylinders, torch and lanterns, tissue rolls sleeping bags etc.A couple of trips back and forth from the store room and we were all set. We stopped at our favorite restaurant for a quick brunch and picked up milk, bread and ice from a nearby safeway. The other food items like teabags, sugar, salt, onion, tomato etc I picked straight from my own kitchen.

The campsite was in a Redwood National Park about 50 mins drive from where we live. That was the first weekend the camp was opened for camping and we thought we were really lucky to have booked such a beautiful and sought after campsite. We reached there early by 1 PM. The regular checkin time is 2 PM. But the lady at the counter allowed us to checkin. We picked wood for campfire from the registration counter and went ahead to check our campsite. Ours was next to a cliff and there was a stream flowing down below. As we started clearing the ground to setup our tent we realized some of the cons of camping on the first day of park opening. The campsite was completely covered with fallen twigs and leaves that had accumulated over the entire fall and winter season. After about 15 mins of sweeping the ground was finally cleared. It didn’t take us long to setup the tent and by 2 PM we were done.

We had plenty of time and a lot to explore in the park. We set out on hike to the waterfall which was full of water this time of the year. The water was so cold that i lost sensation in my feet after just 2 mins of standing in the water. Still that didnt stop me from posing in the water for some pictures. There were kids and other groups who were also playing in water else I was all set to shoot my own Liril ad. The trail we took back to our camp was marked in a lot of sections but in some parts it was missing. We actually lost it after a while and unfortunately had to head back on the same path we came. Heading back on the same trail instead of completing the loop is a bit annoying but we enjoyed our time by clicking more pictures on the way.

Back at the camp we had cup noodles for dinner and made some corn. We still had plenty of time left before the sun went down and so we also caught up on some reading. That evening, was the most peaceful and relaxing evening I spent in past few months.We slept early, as soon as it was dark and after we ran out of fire wood to keep our camp fire burning.It was a bit cold, but I insisted we leave all the windows of the tent open. I love to wake in the morning with sun light falling on my face and to the sounds of the birds. And indeed what a beautiful morning it was. We went to bed with the sounds of insects and the soothing stream flowing below the cliff and woke up with the sounds of birds. We didn’t need any alarm to wake us up. We quickly made some coffee and headed on another hike/ morning walk.

This time we took a different trail. There were more trees fallen on the way and at some places we had to really struggle to cross over them. But I loved the wilderness this way… undisturbed.. in its most pristine natural form. We hiked for almost 2 hours before we reached the camp again. We made some breakfast which included omelets with bread and chai. And then started the most painful process. Dismantling the tent and packing everything up. On our way back we stopped at some turnouts on the road to click more pictures of the beautiful valley. It was so difficult to leave everything behind and head back. We just wanted to soak in more and more of what the nature was offering to us.

As we parked our car in our apartment’s parking lot and started unloading our stuff, a thought crossed my mind. Long time ago we used to live in caves and in forest and then we worked our way through it and built better houses for ourselves. And we thought that would make us happy and contented but instead we have to head back to our natural habitat to relax and unwind… hmmm…humans sure are the weirdest creatures on earth…

PS: This post was long due… since May actually. We went camping twice after that so more camping posts to follow in the coming weeks. Till then some pictures of this trip….

Our Campsite

The Waterfall

The Creek

Fallen Trees

The Trail

So the rule is – Strike out all that you have done from the following list.

1. Graduated high school – Yes Off course!!

2. Kissed someone –

3. Smoked a cigarette – I kinda tried. not a real one though. When I was a about 5-6 yrs old, me and my friend wanted to know how it feels to smoke a cigarette. So we rolled a paper, lighted it at one end, blew it out immediately and tried to swallow the smoke from the other end of the roll. No points guessing what happened next… we were coughing for a long time. Never ever attempted it again.

4. Got so drunk you passed out – Yes. One weekend we finished 2 litres of alcohol ( 1 litre baileys + 1 litre vodka) between 5 of us. The next day, I woke up with a very bad hang over. The house was stinking of orange juice,vodka, chocolate and coffee. I vowed never to drink again so much after that.

5. Rode every ride at an amusement park – Both and Hubby and me are crazy about thrill rides and try to cover all at any park.

6. Collected something stupid – I used to collect a lot of useless stuff.

7. Gone to a rock concert – Nope

8. Helped someone – All the time!!

9. Gone fishing – No.

10. Watched four movies in one night – Definitely done more than that. I am crazy for movies.

11. Lied to someone – A lot of times. Karna padta hai!!! Life…

12. Snorted cocaine – Never!!

13. Smoked Weed – Never!!!

14. Failed a subject – Thank God…Never!!!

15. Been in a car accident – Yeah!! Once on a freeway. There was already a 3 car accident in front of me and traffic had stopped. I had to break really hard to stop without hitting the car in front. The car behind me also barely managed to stop. But the one behind it couldn’t. That car hit the car behind me which hit my car eventually. The impact was not big and my car just had minor scratches. but I was behaving like a paranoid on the road for some days after that.. post crash trauma…

16. Been in a tornado – Not exactly. But there was a level 5 warning in the area that I was living. Thankfully it didn’t touch down.

17. Watched someone die – NO

18. Been to a funeral – Yes

19. Burned yourself – Yeah!! When i was a kid i lighted a matchstick, held it upside down and started crying when it started burning my fingers. I didnt let go even after repeatedly told by the elders. What a funny sight it must have been…

20. Run a marathon – No

21. Cried yourself to sleep – Maybe once or twice

22. Spent over 10,000 bucks in one day – Yes!

23. Flown on an aeroplane – Yes!

24. Cheated on someone – Never

25. Been cheated on – Never

26. Written a 10 page letter – Never written but I did receive a 7 page letter from Hubby once. I am curious to know when he wrote back then… need to go find it today.

27. Gone skiing -Yes! Didn’t enjoy it though. The shoes were very heavy and they were hurting and I kept falling again and again…

28. Been sailing – Yes

29. Cut yourself – Not on purpose but Yes

30. Had a best friend – Still have..

31. Lost someone you loved – Thankfully NO

32. Got into trouble for something you didn’t do – Yes… My brother and I would set each other up many times.

33. Stolen a book from the library – Never!

34. Gone to a different country – Yes!

35. Watched the Harry Potter movies – Yes!

36. Had an online diary – Yes, if this blog counts.

37. Fired a gun – Yes.. plastic ones

38. Gambled in a casino – Yes! Vegas and Atlantic City!!

39. Been in a school play – Yes!

40. Been fired from a job – Thankfully NO

41. Taken a lie detector test – Never

42. Swam with dolphins – No. Dont intend to either. I am scared.

43. Voted for someone on a reality TV show – Yes.

44. Written poetry – Yes. A lot.. Was very kiddish though.

45. Read more than 20 books a year – Ha! I wish i could read that fast.

46. Gone to Europe – If stop overs count, Yes

47. Loved someone you shouldn’t have – Nah!

48. Used a coloring book over age 12 – Yes recently. My boss’ 6 yr old daughter came to office once and she had her coloring book. i was so tempted to color one myself I borrowed it from her.

49. Had a surgery – No

50. Had stitches – No

51. Taken a Taxi - Yes!

52. Had more than 5 IM conversations going on at once – Yes!

53. Been in a fist fight – Yes.. a lot of times, with my brother and once I also picked up a fight with a boy in our apartment because he was calling names to some other friend of ours. I was 11 yrs old at that time.

54. Suffered any form of abuse Verbal – Yes

55. Had a pet – No.

56. Petted a wild animal – Yes…Deers and Rhinos !!!

57. Had your own credit card & bought something with it – Yes!

58. Dyed your hair – No.. but i want to try it once.

59. Got a tattoo – No… but i am seriously think of getting one.

60. Had something pierced – Yes.. Ears!

61. Got straight As – Yes

62. Known someone personally with HIV or AIDS – No

63. Taken pictures with a webcam – Yes

64. Lost something expensive – Yes.

65. Gone to sleep with music on – Yes

Although the movie is made in Marathi, it has subtitles and can be easily understood by non Marathi speaking viewers. This was India’s entry for the Oscars but sadly didnt make it through to the nominations.

The movie depicts the struggles and efforts of Dadasaheb Phalke in making the first cinema in India. It depicts the support he received from his wife and children and friends in achieving his goals. At the time when people were scared to pose in front of a camera for the fear that it will suck energy/life out of them, Dadasaheb had the courage and determination to learn the technicalities of making a motion picture. He didn’t falter even when his eyes gave up after repeatedly watching the then playing english movie. Just because he believed it could prove to be a very good business. He declined offers to setup his movie making business in London but instead worked to promote it in his own country.

He is very aptly called the father of Indian Cinema.However beyond a few awards in his name I don’t think we have done enough to honour this great legend. In fact this is the first good commercial movie made, based on his life that has caught everyone’s attention.

Every movie lover should watch this as a tribute to the great man.

about the history of Indian Cinema.

2. We dont watch TV while having dinner either. Because of which I dont laze around on the couch after dinner and instead complete all post dinner kitchen work promptly. That leaves me ample time to read a book or just simply surf the net before I hit the bed. I have noticed that my life is much more organised when I dont watch TV.

3. We have actually started using our dinning table for dinning. Something we never ever did in the past 3 years. Earlier the dinning table was just used to hold random clutter in the house. Now that we are putting it to use, it looks much neater and cleaner.

4. I went for camping twice this year but didnt write a post about it. I should be writing about it soon.

5. I bought a father’s day card 2 weeks back but forgot to send it. I barely managed to post it today just before the mailing and shipping dept closes. It probably wont reach in time. But i think it is the thought that counts.

6. I have been going to gym everyday this week. My weight reduced around 3 pounds compared to last week.I wanted to start a series like Fitness Fridays or something on this blog where I would post weekly updates of my weightloss. But i think i will wait one more week to see if this streak continues.

7. The Sai Baba temple in my area, where I go every thursday, is moving to a new location this weekend. It is a bigger and better location and it will be closer to my workplace now. But I dont know why i feel sad that it will no longer be at the place where it used to be.

8. I ate Alphonso mangoes from India this season. Hubby ordered them from a website. They were really costly but for someone who hasnt had any for 5 years, they were priceless.

9. There was a flying insect in my cube today, somthing like a moth. I noticed it while I was about to leave for a coffee break. Actually it chased me out. When i returned my collegues told me that it went somewhere else. Now my collegues know how much i freak out at any insect sightings

10. I recently realised my favourite pastime is cleaning and organising the house. One friday when Hubby was stuck with some work in office, I thought I should use my time cleaning the cabinets in the kitchen instead of wasting time waiting for Hubby. I spent nearly 4 hours on a friday evening cleaning and organizing stuff in my kitchen and still wasnt tired. I was happy and greeted Hubby with a smiling face when he came home. Something he is not used to expect when he has ruined my evening with his work. We went out for dinner and then watched a movie on netflix. Ever since that day whenever Hubby is glued to his laptop, I divert my attention to the clutter in my house that needs some organizing or even rearrange already organised stuff.

I have never hated anybody so much in my life. But this one person is getting difficult to handle day by day. He is the reason for so many stressful sleepless night I have spent. He is the reason I hate to go to work even though I really enjoy what I am doing.

Yes he is my BOSS… Bad Obnoxious Sordid Sucker

And this is how I have felt for every single day of the past 2.5 years that I have worked with him and yet there is very little that I can do to get myself out of the circumstances which compel me to deal with him. Only thing I can do is vent my frustration with family and friends.

I am sure there might be many worse managers out there, and mine might not top that list but he is too much for me to handle right now.

Some of his top annoying habits:
- He barges in on any meeting and gives his inputs like he knows everything and goes on and on even when other are giving him the i-don’t-know-what-you-are-talking-about look
- He patronizes us in front of employees from other groups
- He reprimands us for doing something which he himself had been doing till now
- He schedules meeting at 5 PM, on the day before the long weekend for something that can wait till later.
- He makes issue out of a non issue and wastes everyone’s time getting updates on the same.
- He manipulates us and makes it very obvious. And literally laughs when he knows we cannot do anything about it.
- He walks in when we are having good time with our colleagues and intrudes in the discussion by make jokes at our expense.
- He has the worst communication skills
- Doesn’t display even an iota of leadership skills
- And cannot hold up when dealing with managers from groups… result.. we suffer..

There is no arguing with him coz that just makes matters worst. I know he holds a grudge and never forgets. He gets back at the slightest opportunity, which he being my managers, he finds plenty. Sometimes i try to reason with him. If I dont agree on some points i make sure i try to understand his real rationale behind the disagreement. But with him it is always my way or highway.
Sometimes when i dont have the patience to put up with him, I just give up and agree to whatever he says.

It’s not just me, every person in my team has the same view of him and yet there is nothing any of us can do to fix him. You may ask how did he got promoted to be a manager when he has no leadership skills at all.

Well he was the senior most employee in the team when his boss quit and whatever little managerial skill he has gained are through on job training. Which also means he has a long way to go before he can be better manager and find a better job elsewhere.

We contemplated going to his manager but the fact that he has stayed on for so long could mean that he might have a good setting done with his manager. Off course if all of us unite and go together to the management, they would be forced to take some action.But I don’t think my team is united enough to take this step. Although everyone of us feel the same about him there is nothing we can do. I would have quit long back if not for this recession and my status in this country and the fact that I really love my work.

Each one of us in the team get along very well with each other. We all love our work and really enjoy working with each other. It is just this one sucker we need to learn to ignore. I wouldnt mind a manager who is very demanding. One who makes you work like crazy as long as you think he is worthy of being your manager. But a sucker like him who doles shit at at you is really undesirable.

Sometimes I feel, it was good I had the opportunity to deal with such a person. Atleast every next manager will seem better compared to him. He does actually teaches me a lot of self control. Maybe I can learn to see this as a learning opportunity some day and not get frustrated for having to deal with him. But till that day, I will just be stuck with a worthless jerk trying to annoy the hell out of me.

I am not saying that the questions are simple for everyone. Who really remembers everything from 5th grade and I would be lying myself if I say I can do without any help on that show. But this lady is an elementary/primary school teacher. She is expected to know, if not all, atleast most of the answers. Atleast she should have prepared before coming on the show. I hope none of her students were watching the show.

What was she thinking?

My birthday falls in the last week of January and then comes the valentines day and immediately in the same week is our anniversary. I don’t get wowed and surprised 3 separate times however. If you are feeling sad for me now, don’t be. Coz Hubby manages to pack the excitement of all 3 separate occasions in one single installment. Yes!! I get one great gift, made special by the extra thoughtfulness he puts into selecting it and which just blows me away.

Two years back he gifted me a beautiful pearl pendant and earring set because he had heard me mumbling to myself about not having a matching pearl necklace to go with my pearl earrings. Before that he gifted me a set of diamond earrings and a solitaire ring because i had told him sometime that I don’t have any real diamond jewelery. Last year it was another beautiful silver pendant and earrings set. Not once had I told him what I want and yet he managed to get me the most perfect possible gift. And he also keeps tossing in small random gifts throughout the year just to lift my mood if things are not going too well with me. So far his gifts have included a music CD of my favorite music album, a book by an author I love to read, soft toys, perfumes, a jacket, flowers and many more. Sometimes he also comes home early and cooks the dinner and tidies up the home before i reach home.

But this year he has exceeded all the limits he had set in the past. He just raised the bar to a whole new level.This cozy swing is what he gave me this year.
Since childhood I have always loved swings. At my uncles house there is a big wooden swing in the veranda, the kind of which fits 3-4 people. I spent most of my holidays at my uncles house and of those days I have spent the maximum hours on that swing. It wouldn’t matter if it was day or night, raining or sunny, or if I just had my meal or am waiting for one. If i had nothing else to do, I would just clear the space around it and ride the swing experiencing the thrill of soaring higher and higher in the air. Sometimes others feared I might hit the wall behind me and fall but nothing stopped me from going higher and higher.

I have always told Hubby that when we move to back to India, I want to hang a cane swing chair in the house. Where I can just relax after the days work or spend time reading a book on weekends. I never thought the dream would come true so soon. I have spent the past few days enjoying the bliss in my patio. My patio never looked so inviting, not even when the plants were blooming.
All because someone cares for me and understands me so well and knows the small things that even I don’t realize can make me happy. Maybe that is what real love is and the hubby has always defined it so perfectly.

January :
- We kickstarted our new year with an adventurous snow mobiling experience in Lake Tahoe, CA. It was just a one day trip with some close friends. We all had a wonderful time exploring the pristine trails in the frozen Lake Tahoe valley. I have done skiing before but this was so much better. It felt like gliding on the snow, minus the pain from the skiing shoes and the constant falling on your behind.
- In Jan, I also celebrated my 28th birthday. Though not a big achievement but it was made special by the most precious and thoughtful gift I got from Hubby. He gave me back my childhood memories that were locked up in an old cassette.
February:
- In Feb, we celebrated our 3rd wedding anniversary. Which only meant more inquiries from hopeful parents and in-laws about the progress in the baby-making process. If you are Indian and married with no kids yet, you would know what it means. In India it is anybody and everybody’s business to do such inquiries, and you are expected not to punch them in the face to let them know it is none of their bluhdee business.
March:
- In March, we took a short vacation on a lake house. This was also to celebrate our wedding anniversary.
April:
- I dont have any pictures from April in my laptop. So definitely didnt do any outdoor expeditions. But i am assuming we must have gone for short hikes nearby.
- A close look at my inbox reveals we were mostly out on appratment hunt that month, but ended up renewing our existing lease anyways.
May:
- In May, we went for a cherry picking experience. Something we hadn’t done inspite of staying in the bay area for past 3 years. There were other fruits to pick too, like nectrines and peaches, but i liked picking cherries the most. You could eat as much as you want but if you want to collect and take it home you have to buy them at a very nominal price, way lower that the super markets. I feel it is a really great way of doing business but when I see some people wasting a lot of fruits, thats when it becomes disgusting. The farmers actually have to post signs reading “Please do not waste, take only what you need”. Shouldnt this be implied anyways??
June:
- With summer already kicked in, we found ourselves planning more and more outdoor activities. Thats when we also realised we had never been to Niagara Falls together. So we planned our long pending trip to Niagara falls. Well Hubby did most of the planning offcouse, from booking the flights to selecting the hotel and getting the rental car etc. It felt so nice going there again after 4 years. I had been there before with friends when I was living in New York, and wowed by the beauty of it I had decided to come back again with Hubby. So this was kind of like a mini honeymoon for us
July:
- In July we had our very first camping experience, and sadly could not have any more last year after that. But I am planning another one this year, maybe end of next month to celebrate our 4th wedding anniversary. Hopefully bay area gets a little bit warmer by that time.
August:
- August set the ball rolling for meetings and reunions with family and friends. I met my brother after 2 years. He came to visit me while on a short official visit to US. We also celebrated raksha bandhan since his visit was timed roughly around that time. It was quiet an emotional experience as I did the traditional arti and tied Rakhi on his wrist after a very long time, almost 5 years. He tried give me some money in return in the arti plate as per the tradition, and I refused saying there is really no need for any gifts or money as he is the younger brother. But he insisted saying it was the first time he was giving something he earned himself. My little brother, who always asked money from me for small stuff like movies, shoes, clothes etc was now big enough to buy me gifts with his own money. I remember as kids, when we celebrated the Raksha Bandhan or Bhau Beej festival, dad would give him presealed envelopes to give to me and my other cousin sisters when we did the Arti for him. Dad would have separate envelope for his own sister and we always fought with Dad about how he kept more money in his sister’s envelope and less for us. My brother had been waiting for the day he no longer needed to take the money from dad to gift his sisters. You cannot refuse him after that, can you?
- We also went on a one day short trip to Lake Tahoe again while he was here and did parasailing. It was a thrilling experience as we were lifted upto 1200 feet in the air by a rope. The initial fear and the cold wind were totally forgotten as we saw nothing but the vast expanse of blue-green water below.
- I also had my very first blogger meet.
September:
- One of my cousin moved to California for higher studies. She came to visit me 2 weeks before her school started. So that month was mostly going sightseeing with her and later we also drove all the way to southern Califonia to drop her at her university. It is surprising how being away from home brings people so closer. She was as happy to be with us in her initial days in US as we were to have some one from the family over. Needless to say it was hard saying good bye to her as we left her alone in her hostel. She hugged me as I was about to leave and we both started crying, right in the lobby of her hostel oblivious to other people watching us. There was silence in the car as me and Hubby started our return journey back to home except for when we called her every hour to check how she was doing.
October:
- We went on another trip, this time to channel Islands National park. They are a group of 5 separate islands in the Pacific Ocean near Santa Barbara. Due to time restriction we could not cover all 5, we only did 3. What an experience it was. These islands feel so good in October when everything is dried up, I cant imagine how wonderful they would be during spring. These islands are also totally isolated from the mainland and only few companies ( well actually only 2) have licenses to take tourists to these islands.
November:
- In early November, Hubby went to Paris, without me. Yes, you heard it right,he went to the most romantic city alone, for work purposes Offcouse he compensated by bringing back loads of gifts for me and a promise that he will take me there. But unless you see a post here in the future about it, it would be fair to assume he has not fulfilled his promise.
- In November I also met my best friend after 2 years. She lives in New York with her husband and a kid and when she said she was planning a visit to california I was ecstatic. I met her in NY when I first came to this country. Being away from family for the first time, we were both very homesick and eventually found best friends in each other. It was sad she only stayed with me for a day but I am glad we could make the most of the very little time we had together.
December:
-In Dec, I had a 10 day shutdown at work from Christmas to new year and fortunately Hubby Dear also managed to get a week off. So we set out on another road trip. We went to San Deigo and then Death Valley, and also picked up my cousin on our way who was more than happy to join us. In San Diego we went to the zoo, which was huge but boring since the animal looked grumpy and sad. We also went to the sea world but the best part of the trip was a visit to the Wild Animal park. Hubby had reserved this photo caravan tour where you get to feed giraffes and rhinos and take pictures with them. That was the most amazing experience on this trip. Later we drove to Death Valley and were mesmerized by the vast desert, huge natural salt pans and the best part, sand dunes. Death Valley experiences record high temperatures during summer, which makes it difficult for visitors to step out once the sun is out. I am happy we went there in winter.

Looking back at the events of the past year I feel I had a rocking 2009 and wish the coming years brings more joy and is equally rocking.
Moving ahead in 2010, I promise to be more patient and forgiving, two qualities I was born without. I also promise myself to keep up my fitness regime, the one that I have been following rarely for the past few years but managed to keep up with since the begining of this year. An lastly I also want to promise myself to update the blog more often and we will soon find out if I am able to keep up with it.

How would it feel if suddenly you have all those things you could ever wish for but dont exactly recollect getting it. Like your life changed overnight and all of a sudden you have everything you wished for but lost the memory of achieving it? Say you forgot all the struggles you had to go through to get to your goal. Well nobody would really want to remember the tougher days in ones life. We always try to put those things behind and look at the brighter side of life. But can you really do with forgeting a sizable portion of your memory?

Well… this is the case of Lexi Smart, the main character in one of the book I just finished reading. “Remember Me?” is the book written by Sophie Kinsella. The story is about a 28 year old woman named Lexi Smart who meets with an accident and has 3 years of her memory wiped off. She suddenly goes from a 25 year old struggling working girl to the director of the same company she was working for. To her biggest surprise she looks much prettier than she remembered herself to be and also has a gorgeous, drop dead, multimillionaire husband. Seems kind of like a dream come true for her untill she realizes she doesnt remember even a zilch of how she got to be what she is. Even precious moments like meeting her husband for the first time or her wedding day are only left to her imagination from other peoples descriptions. She doesnt even remember if she really loves him. What follows is her struggle to put together pieces of her life that are missing from her memory.

Not that I am severely unhappy with my life at present, but for a brief moment while reading the synopsis of the book I did wish, how wonderful if that happens to me. Not exactly the discover-I-have-a-new-handsome-husband part coz I already have one whom I love to death, but say for starters, I no longer have to put up with the annoying people at work and even better I am their boss now. And I dont have go through any struggle or remember going through any to become the boss and it just feels like life changed for better overnight. I kind of drifted in my very own fairy tale untill i reached to the part in the book where Lexi tries so hard to remember her husband and all the relationship that they share. And a sudden fear gripped me. Ignore the life-gets-magically-perfect part. What if I dont get any of that and still lose my memory. How horrible could that be if one fine day few years of my life are washed from my memory and I forget my marriage or even forget my husband. Still shuddering from the thought I immediately went to Hubby and made him promise he would never give up on me if that ever happened to me, no matter how long he had to wait for my memory to come back. He obliged feeling quiet surprised, completely oblivious to where i was coming from. And true, these incidents are not very common. But reading a book like this makes you stop and think what really must be going on in the life of the person to whom such things do happen? I mean we have seen a lot of similar plots in movies where suddenly in the climax the memory eventually comes back. But what about real life? Is it always the same in real life too?

Sometimes I forget to carry my lunch box or leave my cell phone at home. I feel so pathetic to forget stuff I do daily that I cannot begin to comprehend how sad it would be for people who actually forget who they are. I remember a friend’s mom had suffered from memeory loss. Not due to some accident but something else. My friend was then in the final year of engineering while his mom thought he was still in the the 10th standard. How difficult it must have been for her to accept that she knows nothing about 6 years of her only son’s life. A lot must have happened in those 6 years and everything erased.

Science might have devised ways to treat such losses and there might be family and friends to help. But can any amount of compassion make up for the loss? Can it bring back the memories the person has lost? Something we get busy building all our life. Can we really remember it the same way we used to, if it is narrated by someone else? Can it really be called a memory if you only remember it as told by someone and not remember making it? Can one really recover if God accidentally pressed a shift-delete on important logs from the brain’s hard disk?

Back in the younger days the only way to celebrate was to getup in the morning, put on your new clothes just bought for the occasion and then mom would do the traditional tilak and aarti for you. You would then go to school in your new dress. School allowed students to wear regular clothes instead of uniforms on their birthdays. Thats how the entire school would find out it was your birthday that day and would wish you. Sometime during the day your teacher would let the entire class celebrate your birthday by singing the birthday song and then you would distribute the chocolates and candies specially brought for this occasion to your entire class. Sometimes if it is your best friend or close friends birthday you would get 2 candies instead of one. I remember bringing it home to share with my little brother. In the evening you would invite the neighbourhood friends for a small party. Dad would get the cake and some potato chips and candies and some fruit drink (mostly Rasna) for the party. You would blow the candles and everyone will clap for you and you cut the cake. Mom would take the cake inside to cut into small pieces and bring dishes filled with cake and chips for everyone while everyone else gave you whatever small gift they brought for you. All the kids would get some return gift if any, although that was not a compulsion at that time as it is nowadays. Nothing fancy like they do nowadays, a single pencil or small bag of chocolates would suffice.

Everything was so sweet back then. There were no phone calls waking you up in the middle of the night or disturbing you throughout the day. Whoever wanted to wish you would personally come to see you. As you grew older and went to college, the celebrations took a different form. You stuck to just celebrating with your closest friends instead of the entire class. You would go to some restaurant for snacks where you would typically pick up the tab as a gesture of treating your friends on the occasion and the evening and dinner was reserved for family and close relatives who stopped by.

Crashing at someone’s home at midnight was unthinkable due to potentially disturbing the parents and in some cases even grand parents. I think it is mostly in US that I got acquainted with the weird method of torturing someone by depriving them of sleep right on the night of their birthday. To top it off an even weirder ritual began of applying the cake/icing on the face of the birthday boy/girl… At midnight??? Really??? When you are already in a sleepy mood, washed your face with a scrub and applied night cream and about to fall asleep after a hectic day maybe?? And it does not stop with just a slight application of cake on cheeks, in most cases that I have seen, it is more about painting the entire face with the cream from the cake and also coating ones hair with the cream. How can this be fun? I feel it is simply disgusting and feel terribly sorry for the person for 2 reasons. First he/she has to spend hours after the caking ceremony in the bathroom cleaning up the creamy stuff from face and hair. And next probably the entire night or next day cleaning the mess left in the kitchen or wherever the cake hitting took place. What happened to those simple-no-mess ways of celebrating?

Maybe I am still old fashioned in this aspect. I prefer quiet celebrations. I prefer spending the day with Hubby or maybe just the closest friends. I would love to go for some nice dinner and/or movie and only answer calls during the day time. I wish no one disturbs me at midnight by either showing up at my door or with endless calls. Even if I get labelled as the boring person who never indulges in the fun I can deal with it. Coz birthdays are meant to celebrate the person and not torture him/her by hitting with cake, right?